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Laughing so hard it hurts [26 Jan 2004|07:34pm]

[ mood | silly ]

Lord of the Rings... On the GO! Bad Photoshop-manipulations + Lord of the Rings + CARS = COMEDY GOLD! No, I'm serious, I laughed so hard I think I ruptured something.

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*Shudders* [21 Jan 2004|12:09pm]

[ mood | silly ]

Well, here's the first fiction. You fan find it here. After the review, I'll post my favorite segment from it.


1. I would like to point out to everyone that keyboards are equipped with two amazing buttons: one is the "space bar" and the other is the "enter" key or "return" if you're using a MAC. There are countless others, but these two are very important if anyone is to understand what the hell is is you're saying. So in this story there are lines that look something like this is going to.the author doesn't feel she is important enough to use the space bar button and she doesn't have to capitalize everything that has to be capitalized...and to putaspace somewhere? What a stupid idea that is!

2. It sort of seems like it could be a good plot, it's just poorly executed. Granted, it's so completely random, it's hard to know what sort of plot she was going for the begin with.

3. This is just a sort of tidbit and funny. In the place where the description of your story is supposed to go she simply put, "hi please read". Heh, found that sort of amusing, but anyways..

4. Spell check is an amazing thing. I actually used it before I posted this. Helps tons, especially if you can't spell anything. For example: I think she meant to spell 'patiently' when what she ended up with was 'pationattly'.

5. It's random. Completely random. She mentions something about tattoos and assigning tattoos, and how the main character is looking for the tattoo on the random elf that finds her. This elf, however, is apparently psychic because he knows what she is doing and tells her there is no time for it. He also knows how the main character, Arunel, is supposed to get home. I think she was trying to make this "handsome elf" Legolas, but I'm not sure. Also, the excessive use of the word "love" was annoying. I think it's a good pet name, but uh.. a little heavy on the usage there, love.

So, all in all, it's something that could have been a lot better than it was if it was more detailed, made more use of the space bar/enter key, and if the spell check was used.

Here's a little bit for your reading pleasure ;)

Arunel searched with her hand, she was looking for his tattoo.Her assigned tattoo was a sun, so she new what clone was hers.
The elf took her hand. "You can do that later love, but now we must go.."
Arunel squinted her eyes. "Go where??"
The elf laughed and picked her up. "To your home of coarse,love, I've been looking for a way there..love, would you tell me were to go?"
Arunel looked around *what a smart elf!* she thought.They were right on the path.
"uh...You go straight then rurn right, uh..." she tried to rember the rest of the way back.
The elf pationattly waited..
"Then you follow the left path towards my cabin.."
The elf nodded and took her hand.
It was getting dreadfully hot in the afternoon, and it slowed arunel down, she wasn't surprized when the elf strided faster than her....

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[19 Jan 2004|07:29pm]

[ mood | creative ]

Hello =) I saw a post somewhere for this and I wanted to join. LotR is wicked cool and all but the gay moments for Sam/Frodo are way to hard to resist =P

There are so many bad fics out there; I'm gunna post some that I've found and comments on why I think they're bad.

But I've gotta jet.. work is calling my name >=(

So.. hi =)

.->Mary Beth

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[15 Jan 2004|08:10pm]
Whee. the_grim_wombat posted in my journal a while ago about this community so I decided to join the madness.

Brilliant idea, brilliant name!

So anyway my contribution to the insanity is *dramatic pause*....RotK Very Secret Diaries. YAY.

They're all at my journal greyshipcalling.

And they're funny! I promise!

Seriously, if they're not, it's my mom's fault. She beta'd and told me they were good.
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Another Condensed LotR [14 Jan 2004|09:53pm]

Lord of the Rings: Slightly Condensed! (An animation)

All shall love it and despair.
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[14 Jan 2004|09:58am]

[ mood | crushed ]

Hi everyone! *come on, "Hiiiii Melty"*

So yeah.

I bring with me the sillyness of Molly Ringwraith!!

http://home.earthlink.net/~ladyirony/ROTKparody.html - Here's the link..

and a few of my favourite quotes:

LEGOLAS: The sky wears a film of gauze. The night air breathes infamy. Deceit weaves itself around my fingernails.
ARAGORN: What the hell is that? Poetry? I pay you to do two things: shoot stuff, and look pretty. If you have something to tell me, tell me in normal words.
LEGOLAS: Fine. S-A-U-R-O-N is H-E-R-E. Simple enough for you, numbskull?

SHELOB is hovering above FRODO, who is oblivious.
AUDIENCE: (apparently thinking they're at a horror film) Look up! LOOK UP!! OH MY GOD, LOOK UP!!
FRODO gets caught and bitten, and attractively foams at the mouth. SHELOB wraps him up in spider-silk. ARACHNOPHOBES are whimpering somewhere under their theatre seats. SAM shows up and saves day, stabbing SHELOB with borrowed sword.
SAM: Whew. All right, Mr. Frodo, I know I've teased you about running from spiders before, but I don't blame you for that one. Er, Mr. Frodo? (prod) Frodo?...
FRODO is not looking good. SAM begins weeping and cradling him.
SENTIMENTAL BOOK-READERS: Say "Don't go where I can't follow." Say "Don't go where I can't follow." Say "Don't go where I can't follow."
SAM: Don't go where I can't follow!
SENTIMENTAL BOOK-READERS: Woohoo! All right; I can die happy now.

MERRY: Hello, Pippin. (cough) Would you believe I...got lucky with a hot Rohirrim chickie?
PIPPIN: Er...no. No, Merry, I wouldn't. I'm sorry; I want to humor you when you're this hurt; but no, that's really quite beyond the realm of credibility.
MERRY: Then how do you explain this...(cough)...lipstick on my armor?
PIPPIN: (cry of disbelief) No fair! And all I got was an oily unconscious steward!

and one of my favourites:

FRODO stumbles to his knees and starts beating his head against a rock.
FRODO: This is hopeless! We're doomed. We should have given the bloody thing to the Gondor brothers.
SAM inserts himself between FRODO and rock.
SAM: Sir. Remember our agreement.
FRODO: (humble) No wigging out?
SAM: That's right. Now will you stop wigging out if I move away from the rock?
(Five minutes later)

*giggles hysterically to herself*

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Some fics: [09 Jan 2004|08:42pm]

I'd like to extend a warm moist welcome to our three new members, _materialistic_, bootlegged, and pookizegreat!

Watch me shamelessly plug myself! All of you, feel free to pimp any fanfics/fanart you might have... *shrug* Could be fun.


Title: There and Back Again. Again.
Description: The EPIC TALE of the Fellowship, and their new Quest to save Arwen, Bill, and Sasha the gopher doll from the wicked clutches of Lumpy the Orc.
Rating: PG-13... for PERIL! And gay jokes. And... uh... other stuff, too.

Title: The Lord of the Rings: The Condensed Version
Description: Because let's face it, the books are LONG.
Rating: PG. It's far tamer than the movies.

And remember, Orlando likes it when you review my fics! He might even striptease for you!

(The management does not guarantee that Orlando Bloom will striptease for you, or that the Orlando in question is in fact Orlando Bloom. The management holds no responsibility for any property damage said Orlando may cause.)
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Ha. Haha. Hahahahahahaa... [09 Jan 2004|03:00pm]

[ mood | amused ]

So I was randomly stumbling around drooling over pictures of Karl-with-a-K Urban and, well, I found this.

I laughed a good deal.

Oh, Eomer, you silly little man.

I imagine it's from Xena, judging from the THING in the corner that says Xena (oh the cleverness of me) but I don't watch Xena, so I have no clue what the heck is up there... But damn, it's funny.

*laughs some more*

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Recasting 'Rings' [07 Jan 2004|11:23pm]

So I figure if they ever make another Lord of the Rings movie, it most likely couldn't top the ones they already have out. So I figure, why not go all-out and hire really scary people? And thus, my dream cast for a truly terrifying LotR film experience. Just keep this in mind when you start nitpicking about movie problems, m'kay?

(In something like order of appearance, except for the Fellowship, which is first y0.)

Frodo - Sean Connery
Sam - Arnold Swarzennegger
Aragorn - Rick Moranis
Boromir - David Spade
Legolas - Cheri Oteri
Gimli - Richard Simmons
Merry - Gary Busey
Pippin - Alex Trebek
Gandalf - Regis Philbin

Sauron - Eminem

Bilbo - Keanu Reeves

Lobelia Sackville-Baggins - Cher

Tom Bombadil - Kurt Cobain

Elrond - Verne Troyer
Arwen - Queen Latifah

The Balrog - Bill Cosby

Haldir - Sean Hayes
Rumil and Orophin - Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen

Galadriel - Fran Drescher
Celeborn - Tupac

Treebeard - Kevin McDonald
Quickbeam - Dave Foley

Theoden - Mel Brooks
Eomer - Urkel
Eowyn - Mr. T

Saruman - Jon Stewart
Grima - Mo Rocca

Gollum - Donny Osmond

Faramir - Tom Green
Denethor - Jack Nicholson

The Witchking - Shia LaBeouf

Mouth of Sauron - Gilbert Gottfried
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Hobbits are for life, not just for Christmas. [07 Jan 2004|11:06pm]

As the moderator/founder/God, I suppose I should post first.

...I suppose I shall direct you here. "The mushroom harvest is complete, Legolas."

It so rocks.

That's setting the mood for ya.
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